When we experience trauma or stressful events in life, we tend to pick up beliefs and feelings that we can hold onto without conscious awareness. Because trauma can often be the catalyst, we need to look at these beliefs from a different perspective.

Sometimes, it’s not even our beliefs and feelings, but those passed down in our DNA from stressful events our ancestors faced. This is why, for example, a woman will keep choosing the wrong man over and over and why that will keep happening generation after generation.

When your grandmother was pregnant with your mom, you were in your grandmother’s belly, too, as an egg in your mother’s ovaries.

Whatever beliefs your grandmother had that were passed down to her, will carry on to you, and then you’ll get more from your mom. They are passed down as a chemical mark on your genes, so it doesn’t change your genes, it just determines what genes might get expressed or suppressed, and it’s something we can reverse.

There is no judgment here. We are human; we all experience stress, and we don’t always interpret things to our benefit. We also can’t control the chemical marks we inherit.

What we can do is become aware of beliefs and feelings that might be holding us back, and then we can heal them.

My grandfather died in my arms when I was just five years old. That was pretty traumatic. I didn’t know what was going on, I just knew it was bad.

At around seven years old, I skinned my knee to the bone, so my mother wanted to take me to the hospital for stitches. Well, I threw a fit! I screamed and cried, pleaded and begged her not to take me to the hospital. I won, and now I have a scar to prove it.

At the time I didn’t understand my reaction, but after some healing work around that trauma, it makes sense. The last time I went to a hospital, my grandfather died so my belief was that if you go to a hospital you die. At seven, I didn’t want to die.

When I was going to college to study nutrition, if I had known I would have to work in a hospital, I never would have taken that path; all due to a belief I picked up as a child that I was unaware of. By the time I found out I’d have to go to hospitals, it was too late to quit.

I picked up other beliefs from this event as well such as ‘I am responsible for all the deaths in my family’ and ‘It is my job to save everyone.’ Those beliefs had an impact on how I behaved in certain situations, and they took a toll on my relationships.

Our beliefs and feelings matter and can significantly impact our decisions and relationships. They influence how we view ourselves; are we good enough, worthy, etc. They can have a significant impact on our mental well-being, so we need to address them in our healing process.

Fortunately, our subconscious beliefs and feelings are not our destiny.

We can change them and when we change them for ourselves, we change them for our children and grandchildren as well.

Energy healing is one of best ways to change these subconscious beliefs that keep us stuck in detrimental patterns.

There are many different modalities for energy healing. My favorite is ThetaHealing.

ThetaHealing is a way to heal the chemical marks, whether they are ours or passed down to us, at a cellular level. We can muscle test beliefs, feelings, and unforgiveness, go to God to change them, and muscle test to make sure they changed.

If you don’t believe in God, that’s okay. Only the ThetaHealer needs to believe for it to work.

Other forms of energy healing include tapping, emotional freedom technique (EFT), and Reiki.

Learn more about mental health modalities at our It’s OKAY! Pause, Breathe, Proceed – BIPOC event streaming on Monday, July 31^st at 4 pm PT / 6 pm CT / 7 pm ET. Experts in the mental wellness arena share their experiences with underrepresented communities. Register here for this free event.

Whenever we experience a breakdown in our mental health and well-being, we need to do all the normal things, like eat healthy foods, get plenty of sleep, manage our stress, get out in the sun, take supplements and in some cases, medication, but we also need to consider the beliefs and feelings we may hold that are keeping us stuck and blocking our ability to heal.

We also need to give ourselves some grace and forgiveness. We can heal, but we must recognize that the first step to healing is being kind to ourselves.

The Future of Connection for Women